Rare uncontacted tribe photographed in Amazon

RIO DE JANEIRO (Reuters) - Amazon Indians from one of the world's last uncontacted tribes have been photographed from the air, with striking images released on Thursday showing them painted bright red and brandishing bows and arrows.

The photographs of the tribe near the border between Brazil and Peru are rare evidence that such groups exist. A Brazilian official involved in the expedition said many of them are in increasing danger from illegal logging.

"What is happening in this region is a monumental crime against the natural world, the tribes, the fauna and is further testimony to the complete irrationality with which we, the 'civilized' ones, treat the world," Jose Carlos Meirelles was quoted as saying in a statement by the Survival International group.

One of the pictures, which can be seen on Survival International's Web site (http://www.survival-international.org), shows two Indian men covered in bright red pigment poised to fire arrows at the aircraft while another Indian looks on.

Another photo shows about 15 Indians near thatched huts, some of them also preparing to fire arrows at the aircraft.

"The world needs to wake up to this, and ensure that their territory is protected in accordance with international law. Otherwise, they will soon be made extinct," said Stephen Corry, the director of Survival International, which supports tribal people around the world.

Of more than 100 uncontacted tribes worldwide, more than half live in either Brazil or Peru, Survival International says. It says all are in grave danger of being forced off their land, killed and ravaged by new diseases.

(Reporting by Stuart Grudgings; editing by Sandra Maler)

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In this image made available Thursday May 29, 2008, from Survival International, showing 'uncontacted Indians' of the Envira, who have never before had any contact with the outside world, photographed during an overflight in May 2008, as they camp in the Terra Indigena Kampa e Isolados do Envira, Acre state, Brazil, close to the border with Peru. 'We did the overflight to show their houses, to show they are there, to show they exist,' said uncontacted tribes expert Jos

'In Lien of fault'

Faultlessly Good

by Nilma Dole

www.sundayobserver.lk

Hailing from the hills of Kandy, 'In Lieu of Fault' is surely a band to reckon with. Cute vocalist Chris leads the pack with guitarists Dashan, Dushan and energetic drummer Raveen.

Pic: Priyantha Hettige Location: ‘The Lounge’

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'In Lieu of Fault' formed their brotherhood officially in December 2006 when brothers Dashan and Raveen made friends with Chris in college. The band has seen the involvement of two former members - guitarist Stephan and bassist Sam - that took the band to the forefront during its early hey days.

"We wanted a catchy name to call our band so we decided on 'In Lieu of Fault' because it meant like in place or instead of fault," says Chris. They play melodic death metal with elements of thrash and a hint of Brutal Death.

They say, "It's difficult to get gigs together in Kandy because we hardly have any sponsors or proper equipment but our crowd support is immense."

They have a distinct style of sense with regard to the image on their band, which exudes with their character and sheer metallic power.

They are hoping to release their EP in July and are at the moment recording and working on material for it. Some of their numbers include 'Random Acts of Violence', 'Hertic', 'Screams of Consciousness', 'Apathy' and 'Erase'.

Top off the list, they are influenced by All That Remains, Behemoth, Nile, Lamb of God and The Black Dahlia Murder among many others. They hope to first make it in the Lankan metal scene and take their music to greater heights eventually. Their potential is vast and they have every inch the drive and courage to take their music to the next level.

"There are many bands coming out as wannabes but those who want to make it should be serious about their music," highlights Dashan. "Practise well and play original music and put your heart and soul into doing what you like and then you will get off the ground," is their advice.

Parents of all the band members have been extremely supportive of their work and they acknowledge KRM and the underground metal fanbase for being so loyal.

"It's really good that most of our friends from the Colombo bands come to support and play with us which we really appreciate," says Dashan.

"We are happy that all us bands connect well," notes Chris. They aim to help out younger upcoming bands to take it to the fore and will remain true to the underground metal scene in Kandy.

Also, they thank Rasitha, Buwanaka, brother bands OCM, Merlock, Forlorn Hope, Forsaken, FIH, Cannabis, Vishan, Izzy, Heresy and rock.lk.

Here Come ... RANJEET SINGH with ‘THOUSAND APOLOGIES,

‘THOUSAND APOLOGIES, I AM RANJEET SINGH’

Albert Moses Speaks...

By Sisira Chandrasekera, SLBC UK Correspondent

Many of us still may not know that we can proud of one Sri Lankan who is an internationally renowned film star, TV star, producer, director and a writer in the west. Many of us thought he was an Indian Sikh, because he became popular in the sit com series 'Mind your language' as Ranjeet Singh in the late 70s. When he put the turban on, no one ever knew that he was one of our very own fellow countrymen, from Kandy, the one and only Albert Moses. ('Mind Your Language' series is now available in Colombo on CD and DVD)

In 1981, when I moved from the SLBC to ITN as a Technical Assistant to work in the ITN TV transmitting station at Pannipitiya, I eagerly waited for the Mind Your Language video tape because I wanted to watch the programme before it went on air at 8.00pm on Wednesday nights. I used to watch the tape for at least 4 times before it went on air because it was packed with nothing but 100% British humour.

Every sentence was unique, because you have not heard that humour anywhere else before. The script was written by one of the top comedy writers Vince Powell and produced by Stuart Allen. Later series was produced by Albert Moses himself.

My favourite character was none other than Ranjeet Singh (Albert Moses) and I loved when he started fighting with his classmate Pakistani student Ali Nadim (Dino Shafeek), and his 'Thousand apologies.

In 1981 I thought I must meet this wonderful man one day in person. When I came to London in 1984, I looked for any information about him, where he lived or worked but I did not have success. In 1991 when I went to the City of London Polytechnic (now known as London Metropolitan University)for an interview in their media department, prior to the interview I was given a guided tour by a member of staff.

The guy who took me around told me that this job was previously done by famous actor Albert Moses. My eyes were wide opened and I thought I came to the right place. Unfortunately he had left the job months before I went and staff refused to give me any information about him because of the data protection act that no one can disclose any information about a fellow employee to outsiders. But I did not give up my hopes to meet Albert.

Albert with Kirk Douglas.

In 1998, when I was searching through the web on a search engine, I suddenly found Albert Moses's official webpage on internet. First thing I did was sending an e-mail asking him to contact me as I was desperately looking for him for a TV interview. He was such a down to earth guy, Albert sent me an immediate reply and we started communicating with each other via e-mails. I told him about my connections with the Sri Lankan electronic media and I wanted to make a TV interview for the Rupavahini. Albert very kindly agreed to give me a TV interview free of charge not only that he even agreed to come to my house for the recording.

On a Saturday morning he arrived at Pinner underground station by train, and he waited for me to come and pick him up from there. I was bit late to pick him up so I had to tell him 'Thousand apologies' for my delay. First thing I asked from Albert was how I should call him, whether Mr. Moses, Sir or Albert. He laughed at me and said " Sisira just call me Albert."

It was a fantastic moment in my life to meet the man himself, in front of me whom I have been longing to see in person. My dear friend Tissa Madawela very kindly offered his services to film the TV interview and we started talking about his life and how he started his career as an actor, writer, producer and a director.

Albert Moses was born in Kandy in Sri Lanka. He has worked at the University of Ceylon, Peradeniya for a while and then migrated to Africa for employment. After a while he decided to come to England to pursue his studies in theatre and drama in a drama school in London. This was where his career began as an actor for TV and Cinema.

During this period he had seen an advert in the news paper calling any suitable candidates to act as a Sikh in the Mind your language comedy series. He went for the audition and he has done his part better than a native Indian Sikh national.

The producer and director have been very happy about his performances and offered him the role as Ranjeet Singh. Albert had many Indian Sikh friends and he has spent few days with them to learn the culture and the way of their life style, food, how they speak and how they even wear the turban. He still remembers how his Indian friends taught him how to put the turban on his head and he has observed how they shake their heads while talking.

Albert himself showed me how he learnt while I was doing the TV interview. It was so hilarious the way he explained to me how he learnt the typical life style of Sikhs in London East End.

Albert Moses has been involved with film and television industry for over 30 years now starting in India where he appeared in 7 films, ending up producing and directing the 8th one. He then moved on to Africa where he made documentaries for a short while. In the UK, Albert has been involved in a great number of diverse projects, several of which were ventures filmed around the globe.

In his younger days, Albert's specialties as an actor included: fencing, dancing, singing, motor-cycle stunts, karate and judo. He is fluent in English, Arabic, Tamil, Sinhalese, moderate German and Sanskrit. One of Albert's popular themes was playing the double of Clarke Gable.

In a scene from the movie ‘Robe’

He has played in film, television and theatrical productions with many respected actors including: Kirk Douglas, Oliver Reed, Sir John Gielgud, Roger Moore, Michael Caine, Sean Connery, Charles Dance, Kenneth Williams, Benny Hill, Tim Piggott Smith, Pamela Stevenson, Diana Rigg and many others.

During his extensive career, he has also worked with many internationally renowned directors including John Landis, John Houston, Rob Cohen and Alan Parker. He did prominent roles in many theatre productions such as Freeway at National Theatre Phædra Britannica with Dame Diana Rigg. Long March to Jerusalem at Watford Theatre are few of the many.

He starred in movies such as The Man Who Would Be King - A John Houston film with Sean Connery, Michael Caine and Christopher Plummer, The Spy Who Loved Me - James Bond Movie with Roger Moore, Stand Up Virgin Soldiers - EMI, Carry On Emmanuelle - as an Indian doctor, The Little Drummer Girl - EMI, The Awakening - Columbia Pictures, An American Werewolf In London - John Landis Movie, The Great Quest - with Oliver Reed, Pink Floyd, The Wall - Alan Parker Film, Octopussy - James Bond Movie (as Saddrudin - undercover British agent in India), Jungle Book II - Walt Disney, East Is East - Channel Four Films, Scandalous - with Sir John Gielguld and Pamela Stevenson.

He became very popular on TV programmes such as Queenie - Hollywood mini-series with Kirk Douglas, On The Buses - London Weekend Television , The Loser - LWT, Certain Lack of Communication - BBC - PLAY OF THE MONTH, The British Empire - BBC Series, Warship - BBC, The Boy Dominic - 3 Episodes - YORKSHIRE TELEVISION, Children of the Sun - BBC - PLAY OF THE MONTH, Bill Brand - 4 Episodes - THAMES TELEVISION, Rogues Rock -2 Episodes - SOUTHERN TELEVISION, Horse In The House - THAMES TELEVISION, Robin's Nest - THAMES TELEVISION, Mind Your Language - LWT sitcom (Nearly fifty episodes broadcast between 1977 and 1979) , Two's Company - LWT, The Fuzz - THAMES TV, The Rag Trade - LWT and recently Holby City - BBC DRAMA and many more.

Although Mind your language series became popular world wide, some UK audiences protested over a racial issue and banned showing the complete series on the British television. Sadly some actors of the series are no longer with us.

The teacher Mr. Jeremy Brown (Barry Evans) was mysteriously murdered some years ago. Swedish student Ingrid Bergman is the daughter of Swedish film director Ingmar Bergman.

Albert loves writing children's stories. He wrote Tales from India, The Hawk and the Turtles, Mustapha Mouse and a Book of Poems containing 87 poems. When I met him he was very kind enough to bring me a set of children's books written by him for my daughter. He also handed over some books for me to be given to Colombo Public Library.

He produced 13 episodes of Mind Your Language and produced and directed Gabriella - Television film on location in Malta. Wrote, produced and directed two thrillers for TV in the Alfred Hitchcock style with a surprise ending, set in Malta called Accidental Death and Revenge.

Wrote the title music as well for both. Also hosted, produced and directed, Song and dance show, Talent Contest, Variety Shows in Malta. Albert is a man of many talents. It is very rare to find a man like him who has a heart of gold, who still loves his motherland Sri Lanka. Although he has been away from Sri Lanka for many years, he still supports many charities in Sri Lanka.

He funds many homes for children in Sri Lanka donating his hard earned money. He still enjoys a plate of Sri Lankan rice and curry than English fish and chips. He has not forgotten his roots.

Albert was recently made a Knight of the Order of St John, in recognition of his charity work for children. He currently lives in the leafy suburbs of Hertfordshire County teaching English, free of charge to Eastern European migrant workers. He spends his money and time for many charities in the UK as well.

He loves to come to Sri Lanka and get involved with making films and TV productions. He told me that he is very much happy to accept any offers by any producers who are willing to seek his services for any productions in Sri Lanka. You may contact him via e-mail at albertmoses@ntlworld.com.

I wish him well, good health and long life. Albert, my dear friend we Sri Lankans are proud of you. You are famous from Hollywood to Hollywood and from East End to West End and on the British TV and world wide. We all wish you more and more courage and strength to make many more productions for our viewing pleasure.

- The Sunday times - LK

Knight Rider 2008 series in Danger ! Season 2 : Going to Cancel ???

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Knight Rider 2008 series in Danger ,(Not a Joke)

Go to the site and sign the petition to save Knight Rider !

ABOUT THE CAMPAIGN

With the economy slowing business across the land, not even Knight Rider is safe. Recently in an effort to reduce budgets, Knight Rider's episode order was cut from 23 to 17. Next year, Jay Leno moves into the prime time slot on NBC, meaning that there is 5 less hours of television for shows like ours.

It is because of this reduction that we believe it is important to start now to show those in charge at NBC that we are passionate about Knight Rider and that it should be renewed for a second season.

There are three ways below to help show your support. Please check out our campaign forum for more ideas!

* Information !
http://knightrideronline.com/knight_rider_2008/campaign/


* Sign the Petition
http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/save-knight-rider.html

SIGN THE PETITION

With thousands of signatures and continuing to grow strong, this online petition started by Anthony Pizighelli is something that even cast members of the series have signed!

Sign it now and add your voices to the total ranks!

Although The Nielsen system is outdated, and does not fairly represent the amount of people watching. We understand it is the industry standard for obtaining viewer interest in a particular television show. It is our sincerest hope that this petition will represent to you the commitment of the public in support of Knight Rider as a series.

NBC obviously believed in Knight Rider enough to order all 22 episodes. The series can be a viable resource for NBC if you allow the series to reboot and follow the path set in the 2008 movie. It is our belief that NBC has invested a considerable amount of capitol into producing the show, set cost, prop costs, salaries. Knight Rider is a viable product, if produced, marketed and delivered properly. We ask NBC to not allow a slow start and a poor economy cause a hasty decision that in the end will cost NBC money and viewers.

Online petition - Save Knight Rider

********** Please save Knight Rider for the future... Do something right now !!!!!

EMAIL FEEDBACK

Another great way to contact NBC is via email. Through their contact form at NBC.com (select "Other" from the drop down), you can instantly send your thoughts on Knight Rider. To help you do this daily, may we suggest some of the following constructive lines:

• Thank you NBC for bringing back Knight Rider, with Turbo Boost and KARR--what more could a fan ask for?...Well, come to think of it, a SECOND SEASON OF KNIGHT RIDER!
• The reboot of Knight is the best thing to happen since.....the original series! We are looking forward to season two!
• Gary Scott Thompson and the cast of Knight Rider are amazing! We just have one request for season two - can you resurrect Goliath?
• All I have to say is that Knight Rider is truly "K.I.T.T.": Kool, Innovative, and Totally Turboboost!
• All "KITT-ing" aside, Knight Rider keeps getting better every week--love that Ford!
• Knight Rider is missing just one thing: MORE EPISODES! Looking forward to season two!
• Cars are cool, but Knight Rider has taken that Ford Mustang to a whole new level. When can we start buying the mock-up's of KITT?
• My family and I are thrilled that Knight Rider landed back on N.B.C.! Thanks for the great ride thus far!

Richard Quest, CNN Reporter, Arrested On Drug Charges

The New York Times' City Room blog reports that CNN International business and travel reporter Richard Quest has been arrested on drug charges:

Mr. Quest was arrested early Friday morning after being escorted out of Central Park for violating the park curfew, a law enforcement official said Friday. The park is closed from 1 a.m. to 6 a.m.

The police noticed Mr. Quest at 64th Street and West Drive at about 3:40 a.m., the official said. As he was being escorted out, he volunteered, "I have meth in my pocket," according to an official briefed on the case. The police searched him and recovered a small amount of methamphetamine in a Ziploc bag.
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CNN'S QUEST A VERY 'KNOTTY' BOY

By DAREH GREGORIAN and PHILIP MESSING

TYING ONE ON: CNN broadcaster Richard Quest was busted in the wee hours in Central Park yesterday with a rope tied to his neck and genitals. "I've got some meth in my pocket," he helpfully told the arresting officer.

This is CNN? Kinky!

CNN personality Richard Quest was busted in Central Park early yesterday with some drugs in his pocket, a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals, and a sex toy in his boot, law-enforcement sources said.

Quest, 46, was arrested at around 3:40 a.m. after a cop spotted him and another man inside the park near 64th Street, a police source said.

The criminal complaint against Quest said the park was closed at the time - something Quest should have known because of all the signs saying "Park Closed 1 a.m. to 6 a.m."

Quest was initially busted for loitering, the source said. Aside from the oddly configured rope, the search also turned up a sex toy inside of his boot, and a small bag of methamphetamine in his left jacket pocket.

It wasn't immediately clear what the rope was for.

The criminal complaint says the officer at the scene was able to ID the drug because of "his prior experience as a police officer in drug arrests, observation of packaging which is characteristic of this type of drug, and defendant's statements that . . . 'I've got some meth in my pocket.' "

He was charged with loitering and criminal possession of a controlled substance. His unusual get-up didn't lead to a lewdness charge because he wasn't exposing himself, the police source said.

Quest's unidentified companion was given a summons for not carrying any identification, the source said.

Quest's lawyer, Alan Abramson, had a much more innocuous version of events.

"Mr. Quest didn't realize that the park had a curfew," Abramson said. He was simply "returning to his hotel with friends."

At a hearing in Manhattan Criminal Court, Quest agreed to undergo six months of drug counseling in return for an "adjournment in contemplation of dismissal," which means the misdemeanor charges against him will be dropped and the case sealed if he stays out of trouble and completes his drug program.

He was released with no bail after spending most of the day behind bars.

Abramson predicted after the hearing that "the case will be dismissed." He declined to answer questions.

Quest, known for his hollering antics and stunts on the cable news network and its international counterpart, declined comment, as did a CNN spokeswoman.

On his official CNN bio, the network calls him "one of the most instantly recognizable members of the CNN team."

"He has become one of the network's highest profile presenters," and his "dynamic and distinctive style has made him a unique figure in the field of business and news broadcasting," the network's Web site says.

He was reportedly once offered a position for the English-language version of the controversial Al Jazeera network, but said he turned it down because being gay and Jewish, he didn't think it would be a good fit.

Now, Free Download : Indian Premier League team guide And Schedule

Download Free -

Indian Premier League team guide And Schedule

as a,
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@ As a Word Document,
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Fun stories in April

1. Blonde Joke

Blonde paint job

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari." 2. Lawyer Joke Generous lawyer A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. "Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?" The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?" Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, "Um ... no." The lawyer interrupts, "or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?" The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again. "or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!" The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..." On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you?" 3. Dirty Joke Girls night out Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home. The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!' 4. Bar Joke Glad to be drunk A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in, pal. You're obviously drunk." Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?" "Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper. "Let's go." Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled." Lawyer Joke 10 Husbands, Still a Virgin A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?" "Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me. Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up. Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver. Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not. Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it. Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it. Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it. Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!" "Good," said the new husband, "but, why?" "You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!" 5. Misc Joke 101 Ways To Annoy People 1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly. 2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage." 3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." 4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..." 5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others. 6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. < 7. Speak only in a "robot" voice. 8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. 9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub". 10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies. 11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. 12. Sniffle incessantly. 13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles. 14. Name your dog "Dog." 15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up." 16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think." 17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training." 18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace". 19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot." 20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol. 21. Practice making fax and modem noises. 22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss. 23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. 24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance. 25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person." 26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy." 27. Wear a special hip holster for your remote control. 28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. 29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. 30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room. 31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice. 32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting. 33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way." 34. Drum on every available surface. 35. Staple papers in the middle of the page. 36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates. 37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings. 38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks. 39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places. 40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page. 41. Set alarms for random times. 42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon. 43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving. 44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise. 45. Honk and wave to strangers. 46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange. 47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show. 48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies. 49. Wear your pants backwards. 50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register. 51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!" 52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE. 53. only type in lowercase. 54. dont use any punctuation either 55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets. 56. Pay for your dinner with pennies. 57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes. 58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question. 59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps. 60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories. 61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now." 62. Light road flares on a birthday cake. 63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley. 64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency. 65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador." 66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks. 67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained. 68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One." 69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk. 70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read. 71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it. 72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat. 73. Drive half a block. 74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination. 75. Ask people what gender they are. 76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back. 77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl. 78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes". 79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song. 80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet. 81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day. 82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September. 83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a." 84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. 85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed. 86. Wear a LOT of cologne. 87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing." 88. Sing along at the opera. 89. Mow your lawn with scissors. 90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!" 91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend." 92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme. 93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles." 94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture." 95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times. 96. Never make eye contact. 97. Never break eye contact. 98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn. 99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results. 100. Make appointments for the 31st of September. 101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties. 6. Misc Joke 101 Ways To Annoy People 1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly. 2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage." 3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." 4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..." 5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others. 6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. < 7. Speak only in a "robot" voice. 8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. 9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub". 10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies. 11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. 12. Sniffle incessantly. 13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles. 14. Name your dog "Dog." 15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up." 16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think." 17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training." 18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace". 19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot." 20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol. 21. Practice making fax and modem noises. 22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss. 23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. 24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance. 25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person." 26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy." 27. Wear a special hip holster for your remote control. 28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. 29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. 30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room. 31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice. 32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting. 33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way." 34. Drum on every available surface. 35. Staple papers in the middle of the page. 36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates. 37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings. 38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks. 39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places. 40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page. 41. Set alarms for random times. 42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon. 43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving. 44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise. 45. Honk and wave to strangers. 46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange. 47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show. 48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies. 49. Wear your pants backwards. 50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register. 51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!" 52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE. 53. only type in lowercase. 54. dont use any punctuation either 55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets. 56. Pay for your dinner with pennies. 57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes. 58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question. 59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps. 60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories. 61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now." 62. Light road flares on a birthday cake. 63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley. 64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency. 65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador." 66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks. 67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained. 68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One." 69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk. 70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read. 71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it. 72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat. 73. Drive half a block. 74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination. 75. Ask people what gender they are. 76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back. 77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl. 78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes". 79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song. 80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet. 81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day. 82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September. 83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a." 84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. 85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed. 86. Wear a LOT of cologne. 87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing." 88. Sing along at the opera. 89. Mow your lawn with scissors. 90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!" 91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend." 92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme. 93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles." 94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture." 95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times. 96. Never make eye contact. 97. Never break eye contact. 98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn. 99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results. 100. Make appointments for the 31st of September. 101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties. 7. Gender Joke ABC's of ex girlfriends A is for Arteries. You know, the things that your ex-girlfriend ripped out because she really didn't care for you you twit she was only after your money and could have given a shit about you. B is for Bitter. Who, me?? No way. I really hope things between them do work out. I hope they get married and have 2 children that are little devils and her hips get huge and his eyebrows finally grow completely together and they get fat and old together and then DIE!! C is for Call ya later.She won't. She never has before. D is for Dumped. Does D need to be explained? E is for Eating like a pig. Remember when you took her out and she said "I'm not hungry" so you figured you could take her to a nice place because you were able to afford a nice meal at this fine restaurant. Then she ate more than your Uncle Roy (you remember Uncle Roy the one with the mustard stains on everything). So you flip the bill and are broke for the next two weeks and she wonders why you were unable to call her that week and go see movies. F is for Friends. That is what she just wants to be. As if you can even stand to look at her. G is for Gun. And yes there is a waiting period. H is for Horny. Remember when she looked nice and even had a personality? Well, you figure it out. I stands for I still hate her. Odds are I always will, unless she calls me and offers me favors. J stands for Jim. This is her new boyfriend. Doesn't Jim have a nice car ? Doesn't Jim have a good job? Why does Jim want to date her? I think Jim could do much better. I hate Jim. Jim is my mortal enemy. K stands for Kill. L is for Love. It's a great euphoric feeling that exists between two people and is shared upon by both parties. L is also for Lunatic. Lunatics are crazy. Lunatics are the last people that actually believe in love. M stands for Mephistophiles. That is who she worked for. N stands for Necropheliac. She didn't move very much, did she? O is for On top. When on top she has another O word. P is for Pill. She said she was on it. She lied. She is now sueing you for a few hundred bucks a month. Q is for Quitter. She couldn't last. R is for Rich little Bitch. She bought my love but I paid for it. S stands for Suffer. That's what she made me do. T is for torture. Torture is what she did. She tortured you with the truth. She also tortured you with lies. U is for Understatement. Saying you hate that bitch is an understatement. V is for Voluptuous. That is the primamry reason you were dating her in the first place. W stands for Whine. She was a pro at this. X is for Xylophone. Because X is always for xylophone. Y stands for You suck! Remember when she yelled that at you. Z stands for ZIPPER. This is what you got your hair stuck in while trying to get dressed too quickly while she yelled "QUICK! They're home!" . stands for period. Which is a couple of weeks late, because she lied to you about taking what P stands for. It also means you won't get any for a week. 8. Blonde Joke A Blonde Goes On Who Wants To Be A Millionaire Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far - $500,000 and one lifeline left -- phone a friend. The next question will give you the top prize of One Million dollars if you get it right ... but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000 -- are you ready?" Barbara: "Sure, I'll have a go!" Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it........ A-Robin B-Sparrow C-Cuckoo D-Thrush Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars." "I think I know who it..but I'm not 100%... No, I haven't got a clue. I'd like to phone a friend Regis, just to be sure. Regis: "Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone? Barbara: "I'll phone my friend Maggie back home in Birmingham." (ringing) Maggie (also a blonde): "Hello..." Regis: "Hello Maggie, its Regis here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500,000, but needs your help to be a Million. The next voice you hear will be Barbara's and she'll read you the question. There are 4 possible answers and 1 correct answer and you have 30 seconds to answer -- fire away Barbara." Barbara: "Maggie, which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it: A-Robin B-Sparrow C-Cuckoo D-Thrush" Maggie: "Oh Gees, Barbara that's simple.....It's a Cuckoo." Barbara: "You think?" Maggie: "I'm sure." Barbara: " Thanks Maggie." (hangs up) Regis: "Well, do you want to stick on $500,000 or play on for the Million, Barbara?" Barbara: "I want to play, I'll go with C-Cuckoo" Regis: "Is that your final answer?" Barbara: "It is." Regis: "Are you confident?" Barbara: "Yes fairly, Maggie's a sound bet." Regis: "Barbara.....you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo ...you're right! - You have just won ONE MILLION DOLLARS. Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience please put your hands together for Barbara." (clapping) That night Barbara calls round to Maggie and brings her down to a local bar for a celebration drink and, as they are sipping their Champagne, Barbara turns to Maggie and asks "Tell me Maggie, How in God's name did you know that it was the Cuckoo that does not build its own nest? Maggie: "Listen Barbara, everybody knows that a Cuckoo lives in a clock." 9. Blonde Joke Only three doors An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?" The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!" 10. Dirty Joke Poor guy A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!" 11. Dirty Joke The bride tells her husband The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?" "OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'the prison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is: put the prisoner in the prison. And then they made love for the first time. Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction. Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped." Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him." After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes but the girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives him a suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!" The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recently born foal. Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted. She nudges him and says, "Honey, the prisoner escaped again." Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence, OKAY! 12. Misc Joke Two zebras pondering Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is." 13. Lawyer Joke Billing A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?" "I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer. Gender Joke Advantages Of Being A Woman Why it's better to be a Woman! 1. We got off the Titanic first. 2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers. 3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours. 4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers. 5. We can cry and get off speeding fines. 6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game. 7. Taxis stop for us. 8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance. 9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing. 10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point). 11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay. 12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay. 13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life. 14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower. 15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves. 16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know. 17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt. 18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it. 19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there. 20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute. 21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in. 22. We have the ability to dress ourselves. 23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked. 24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot. 25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth. 26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems. 27. We'll never regret piercing our ears. 28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes. 29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark. 30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.

coolfunnyjokes

Vote Here ! Sinharaja Forest for "New 7 Wonders of Nature

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Vote Sinharaja Forest for "New 7 Wonders of Nature"

The Ministry of Environment and Natural Resources has called upon all Sri Lankans to vote for the Sinharaja Forest to be included in the "New 7 Wonders of Nature". How to vote...***************** ******** Click the links below as follows * Select the region (asia) * Select Singharaja Forest from the nominee list * click Vote Now... * Fill in the essential info, you have seven votes so select asia from the drop-down box * then Singharaja forest from the consequent drop-down box * Finally submit... Sources - Daily Mirror

New 7 Wonders of Nature

Welcome to the election of the

Please browse through the list of nature sites nominated to date by a click on the world map below. Or select one of the following options:

• Vote for your nominee
  You have one voice, but seven votes.
• Suggest a nominee
  Send us the location you would like to enter into the New7Wonders of Nature
• Support a nominee
  Set up an Official Supporting Committee for your nominee

To see a list of nature sites nominated to date, click on the map.

What is "The New 7 Wonders of Nature"?
Read more about the new campaign of the New7Wonders!

Voting procedure for the New 7 Wonders of the World

BoyZone Re- Unite in May This Year

Boyzone hone in on Blickling

One of the biggest selling bands of the 1990s have revealed that they’re on their way to play an outdoor gig at Blickling Hall, near Aylsham, this summer.

Boyzone have become men since their reunion

Take That have done it, the Spice Girls have done it, with Boyzone now following suit with a reunion and a tour which is coming to Blickling.

The Irish band – who announced they were getting back together in November last year – are to play an open-air gig in the refined parklands of the north Norfolk stately home on Sunday, 20 July, 2008.

All five original members of Boyzone will be reunited for the Back Again – No Matter What road trip – the group's first in seven years.

The Blickling Hall picnic-style concert has been added to the band's tour, which starts in May.

Boyzone got together in 1994 and had 16 top five hits on the trot, including six number one singles and five number one albums.

They split after Ronan Keating chose to work on solo material – with the Blickling visit a return trip for the singer, who performed a sellout gig at the venue in 2005.

The boys – including Stephen Gately, Shane Lynch, Mikey Graham and Keith Duffy – decided to reform after rehearsals for 2007’s BBC Children In Need show.

Ronan said at the time: "We've been talking about getting back together for some time now. I can't wait to be back on the road and all the guys feel the same."

The Boyzone gig is the second act to be revealed by the venue's concert organisers - a Pop Party featuring 11 acts from the '80s will take place on Saturday, 19 July 2008.

Tickets costing £37.50 went on sale on Friday, 8 February, 2008 on Ticketline on 0871 424 4444 (plus booking fee), Blickling Hall on 0844 800 4308 (plus booking fee – personal callers paying by cash or cheque won't get charged a fee).

all tour dates:

May 2008 ***************

30th - London, O2 Arena
31st - London, O2 Arena

June 2008 ************

1st - London, Wembley Arena
3rd - Nottingham, Arena
4th - Nottingham, Arena
6th - Cardiff, International Arena
7th - Cardiff, International Arena
8th - Cardiff, International Arena
10th - Birmingham, NEC
11th - Birmingham, NEC
13th - Manchester, Arena
14th - Manchester, Arena
15th - Liverpool, Arena
17th - Newcastle, Arena
18th - Newcastle, Arena
19th - Sheffield, Arena
20th - Sheffield, Arena
22nd - Glasgow, SECC
23rd - Glasgow, SECC

Two dates have also been added to the UK tour as follows:

Thu 29th May at Cardiff International Arena (tickets 02920 22 44 88) On sale Sat 9th Feb - 9 am.

Thu 26th June at Aberdeen ECC (tickets 08444 77 9000) On sale Sat 9th February - 9 am.

Also added is Newmarket Racecourse on Friday 15th August. Tickets on sale Friday 8th Feb.

See Video , Click Here

source: http://boyzonetour.com

BBC Criticised For Non-Censoring of Boyzone Single

By Turlough Delaney

That one, whathisname, him, the other one and whatdyacallhim

The BBC has found itself under sustained criticism over the last few days for its decision not to censor an old Boyzone hit from 1998.

BBC bosses decided to put the ‘classic’ track No Matter What back on their radio playlist in recognition of the Irish boyband’s unwanted reunion earlier this month.

Most other mainstream radio stations had taken the decision to censor all Boyzone ‘music’ in protest of the untalented fivesome getting back together and organising a tour for next year.

However, so as not to offend the public, the BBC have been playing an edited version of the track with altered lyrics in order to offset the deep hypocrisy underlying the song and the its singers. The original chorus will now be replaced with the lyrics:

No matter what we tell them/No matter what we say/ No matter that we hate each other/Its about money at the end of the day/No, no matter/Money’s all that matters to me…

Radio 1 controller Andy Parfitt has since come out and responded to furore. “Our decision not to censor Boyzone music and play their version of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s No Matter What was based on requests to Radio 1 by a significant number of twentysomething single women to do so in the wake of the reunion.

“We believe the women’s desire to hear Boyzone again was a way of helping them to escape the misery of their present lives and wallow in the nostalgia of their long gone blissful teenage years. And being a public service broadcaster we felt a duty to accede to these requests.

“At the same time, we at the BBC are mindful of our responsibility not to damage the mental health of our young audience by overexposing them to the brain-rotting effects of the Boyzone back catalogue. That is why we are careful only to play No Matter What with the altered lyrics that acknowledges the purely monetary motivation on the part of the group’s members.”

In an official letter of protest to his employers BBC Radio 1’s resident slop-jock Chris Moyles, said their decision to play the song, no matter what version, was totally wrong:

“I thought Radio 1 had ended their policy of giving a forum for ‘boybland’ non-entities inflicting their offensively soulless ‘music’ on the public. I and many of my fellow BBC DJs believe the national broadcaster should not be encouraging such a deeply cynical exercise by Boyzone to cash in on the current trend for waste-of-space pop groups reforming by putting one of their old hits on the A list.”

Radio phone-in shows on the BBC’s other stations, as well as their website forums have also been jammed with irate members of the public venting their spleen that old Boyzone crap is back polluting the airwaves.

Said one poster: “When Take That reformed we tolerated it because they split up years ago and weren’t all that bad really. Soon afterwards the Spice Girls announced their reunion and by then many of us were starting to get a bit uncomfortable, but we let it pass…

“But now these rejects have followed suit when nobody – absolutely NOBODY - wanted it! This band shouldn’t have existed in the first place - they had nothing to offer back then and they have zero relevance now. If I were a religious person I would say that this was the work of the Devil. And the BBC is encouraging it! The BBC is in league with Satan!”

So far, none of the five members of Boyzone have been arsed commenting on the scandal.

Spice Girls Stop Their Reunion Tour

Spice Girls Stop Their Reunion Tour

The Spice Girls have played their final gig after their final reunion tour.

The final stop on the girls’ whirlwind tour, which included 47 show in the US, Canada, Europe, was Toronto, where they ended the night with a group hug on stage.

Emma Bunton, Melanie Chisholm, Melanie Brown, Geri Halliwell and Victoria Beckham cut their “Return of the Spice Girls” tour.

On their website, the five wrote a short message to fans saying they hope “girl power” will live on through future generations.

She revealed, “Our time is up…we’ve come to the end of the road…there are tears of both sadness and joy,” they wrote, ending with the words: “mission accomplished.”

Each of the girls is thought to have new projects lined up, although Mel C. is expected to be the only one to release a solo album in the near future.

Sanath, Kamal join radio with 'Neth FM

Sanath, Kamal join radio with 'Neth'

By Susitha R. Fernando

Sanath with Neth team

Veteran actors Sanath Gunatilake and Kamal Addararachchi have joined 'Neth FM' to promote cinema and literature through radio.

Sanath, will appear in the evening programme 'Ridi Nimnaya' every Friday from 7 to 9 pm with entertaining and educative information related to cinema. The programme is to feature a variety of artistes including veteran filmmaker Sumithra Peries, actress Malani Fonseka, script writer and director Tissa Abeysekera while box office record producers like Neil Rupasinghe are also to take part.

'Ridi Nimnaya' is the first radio programme conducted by the acclaimed actor who has won a number of awards. Speaking about his selection for the programme, Sanath said educating the film audience through other media is very important for the development of cinema.

"Even though our cinema has given less attention to the film sound, the medium of sound or the radio is a very powerful channel to reach the audience," he added.

Actor Kamal Addararachchi is to voice the role of Sarath, the main character Sarath in the radio drama based on Kumara Karunaratne's novel 'Rathu Rosa', (Red rose). Kamal played the same role when the novel was made into a television drama. The drama will be aired everyday from 2 to 4 pm on Neth FM. The programme is a follow up of earlier radio dramas based on the famous novel 'Golu Handawatha' (Silent Heart) and 'Gehenu Lamai' (Girls) by Karunasena Jayalath.

"Twenty years ago I worked as a radio artiste but the present role as Sarath is going to be a challenging one," said Kamal describing his role.Asanka Jayasuriya, Chief Executive Officer, Neth FM describing the aim behind the novel programme said "Neth wants to support and promote not only cinema and radio drama but other mediums like music and theatre.